Kangana Ranaut

They say that behind every successful man is a woman. There probably has never been a phrase more sexist or demeaning to women. If anything the cliche is nothing more than a back-handed compliment to those women who "make successful men" by cooking, washing and breeding for them while quietly tiptoeing five steps behind the glory of their men. Such is the deep-rooted patriarchy and hypocrisy of our society that despite decades of the so-called feminist movements, endless television debates, tedious essays and speeches we are yet to come up with an answer to who could possibly be behind a successful woman. That's because behind every self-made, successful woman, there is a woman too: herself. And that success comes neatly packaged with rumours, controversies and some disgruntled lovers.

No, this is not yet another preachy piece on women empowerment. We have enough and more working in that department.

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This is the story of actress Kangana Ranaut. With several awards, including four national awards, in her kitty, Kangana sits lightly on her stardom. The diva, who stands before the camera rolling out her attitude and power, is now relaxed in her white joggers offering to make a cup of tea. "Sugar, milk?" she asks, sinking into the sofa and crouching into a fetal position. If one didn't know that this star from the hills of Himachal is one the highest paid actors in Bollywood today, all you would have seen is a child-woman playing with her curly hair that is in desperate need of a colour retouch. But then Kangana would rather walk in urchin blonde than let her hair be coloured anywhere but Milan.

That is how far Kangana has come from the last time I met her when she was still the "outsider" struggling to fit into an industry that was ruled by star-kids and "childhood buddies". I reminded her of her first appearance on the, then immensely popular, show Koffee With Karan, where she was joined by two other girls with popular surnames. She was clearly the third wheel in the clique as the rest of them sipped on Koffee and exchanged insider gossip and jokes. Kangana says, "Yes, I was uncomfortable. It was during the initial phase of my career and was not quite sure how to respond to the comfort level that the other two girls had with Karan, which was obvious given they had known each other for a long time and had interesting things to share." That was a period when individuals from within and outside of the film industry made fun of her lisp and inability to speak 'propah' English.

The uncomfortable, unsure, vulnerable young hillbilly has now been replaced by a well-spoken, confident, I-give-a-damn woman who knows what she wants in life. "The problem is that people find it very difficult to accept that a woman is as 'normal' as a man. That is why I have never seen myself as a man or a woman. I have my needs, be it my ambition, money or sex. What is wrong in accepting that I have a sexual appetite just like any other human being? And once you become successful, it is that much more difficult. I have even been accused of using black magic on men. I have been slut-shamed, called a whore...", she says, a clear reference to her controversial fallout with Hrithik Roshan.

For those who missed out on the dirty laundry, the story is, at best, a fling gone wrong. It began with Kangana referring to her co-star in Krissh 2, Hrithik as a silly ex. Hrithik, who had recently separated from wife Suzanne Khan, took offence and denied any relationship, leave alone being an 'ex'. He claimed there was an imposter and that Kangana was confusing him for the real one and promptly sent a legal notice to Kangana demanding an unconditional public apology. Kangana dug in her six-inch Louboutins and sent a return gift with a feisty legal notice. She asks, "Why should I apologise when I have not done anything wrong. If he believes there is an imposter let him bring that person in front of the world."

On the periphery of the scandal, Shekhar Suman's son Adhyayan, with whom Kangana was in a relationship almost eight years ago, claimed in a Bombay-based newspaper that he had suffered at the hands of Kangana and that astrologers had told him that she was doing black magic on him. Given he has nothing much to cling to in terms of success besides a once-famous father, Adhyayan's attempt to shame Kangana was probably his way to his last bit of newsprint.

"They are bullies. They think with their name and fame they can shame me. Can you imagine that I was accused of mixing my menstrual blood in food to bring men under my spell. Look at what happened to my sister Rangoli. Some bully threw acid on her face because he thought it was okay to do such a thing because she said no to him. It is the same mentality. But I have seen this kind of behaviour right from my childhood. My father would bring guns as gifts for my brother Akshat and ask him to play act shooting. So, a child growing up learning violence is okay, while the women of the house had to cover their faces when they went out. I knew that was clearly not my life and left home."

Much of what happened after leaving home is the regular story of a young, 16-year-old beautiful girl trying to chase glamour. A bit of modeling, several auditions, a canned film, trying to make do with little to no money.... Kangana had to fight the battle of wills, until luck chanced upon her. One day, an agent took her to meet producer Mahesh Bhatt, where she happened to meet and interacted with the director, Anurag Basu and auditioned for the lead role in his romantic thriller Gangster. Bhatt felt that she was too young for the role and signed Chitrangada Singh instead, who eventually could not make it. Kangana got the call that would change it all. At 17, she played the pivotal role of Simran, an alcoholic woman caught in a romantic triangle between a notorious gangster (Shiney Ahuja) and a sympathetic friend (Emraan Hashmi). She won the Filmfare Best Debut.

Several similar roles followed, until Kangana decided to turn the tide. Tired of being typecast as the neurotic, crazy woman, she went looking for a role that was fun. And the world found the girl next door, with a sense of humour they could relate to in Tanu Weds Manu opposite southern actor Madhavan. At times critically-acclaimed but commercially-failed, nevertheless Kangana kept going. The game changer was Queen that won her the national award for best actress.

When the world handed her lemons, she made Limoncello. The bumpy professional and personal ride has not broken Kangana's faith or her determination. Neither has it taken away her belief in love. "Yes, I am in a relationship. There is indeed a man in my life and I am enjoying it. I do want to get married. But not because I am 30 and time is running out. But then you know what, I have this special gift of going for the worst guy in the world," she laughs, and looks away solemnly, but quickly returns to herself saying, "The best thing is that today many women, like me, have the choice to live independently and choose the kind of life we want." Indeed. The Queen who is now on her way to Rangoon must know.